Blessing

Sean
Originally uploaded by art chick.

Ok. So I feel kind of bad that one of the only things anyone knows about Sean from reading my blog is that he likes to go pants-free quite a bit of the time. Over the last month or so he has made great strides in rejoining the pants-wearers of the world. Of course, at this very moment, he is sitting on the floor watching TV wearing nothing from the waist down. Baby steps.

So, anyway. With all that's been going on with Liam and his upcoming assessment and everything, I've been using my blog space to work out my feelings about a lot of what's on my mind in that regard. I felt like I wanted to take some time to talk about Sean and how great he is and how Rusty and I feel really honored to be raising this child as well.

Rusty and I aren't really the type of people to go around saying things like "Verily, our children are truly a blessing to our house". Most of the time we're yelling things like, "Get your foot off of the table while you're eating" or "Close the door when you go potty. No one wants to hear that." But honestly? We believe we are blessed to have the really great kids that we have.

Sean turned four this past September. And he's everything that a four-year old should be. He's cute, he's smart, he's active and he's hysterical. He makes Rusty and I laugh and totally loves his Mommy and Daddy. He throws himself at us to give spontaneous hugs on a regular basis. He carries on little conversations with us and he knows what he likes and what he doesn't. He's hitting all of his milestones and then some. He's just a fun kid to be around.

That? Was a very hard phrase for me to type - "a fun kid to be around". I'm not sure why. Maybe because Liam, through no fault of his own, often isn't a fun kid to be around. You have to be on your guard to make sure he doesn't get upset about odd things. His outbursts are embarrassing and also make you more protective toward him because you don't want other people thinking he's just being a brat. He struggles to get complete thoughts and sentences out sometimes. A lot of times it's just harder. And for a while, I was too ashamed to write that because I really felt like it was "wrong" for me to feel that way. But after a lot of prayer and thought and maturing spiritually I am now at a place where I can say that though Liam is often a complex child to parent? I adore him. I love his quirks and his unique views of the world even though it's more of a challenge to deal with a lot of time. And I can finally say, without feeling like a bad mom, that Sean is a lot of fun to parent. And that I enjoy being his Mom in so many ways that I haven't been able to share with Liam because that just not who Liam is or what he's capable of in some ways.

While I never want Liam to feel like he isn't as good, or smart or "fun" as Sean? I also never want Sean to feel like he and his childhood have to take a backseat to Liam's issues and what we have to do to resolve and/or deal with them. Sean deserves just as much time and attention and discussion (often resulting in much laughter). I love both of our boys and I truly feel honored to have been chosen to raise them to become the men God created them to be. A little freaked out, but honored nonetheless.