Updating (Hi, Linda!)

Ok. So it's been brought to my attention that I haven't updated in a while. I've been busy. And annoyed. Not by the people asking me to update. But I'll get into that in a minute.

First, I have to answer the calls for photos of ex-boyfriend/current TV guy. I have debated posting his photo. To be perfectly honest, I don't want him showing up in my email box. Did I mention I broke up with him when I met my husband? Oh yeah. Must have left that part out. He's a very nice guy and I really do hope he's having a great life. He deserves it.

Ok, so moving on from DJ Boy. My annoyances this week:

1. Hot glue guns. I hate hot glue guns. Hate with the white-hot passion of a thousand suns. I hate the little gluey stringy pieces that linger all over the place. I hate burning my fingers. Despite all the hate, I pulled out my hot glue gun to make four ginormous wreathes for my mother-in-law's work Christmas banquet. I totally didn't mind helping out. I just hated the hot glue episodes.

2. Stupid customer service people. And by "stupid" I don't mean "you stupid so and so...". I mean stoo-oo-pid. As in, first telling me to go to their website to bring up a list of network providers but then telling me afterwards that though it is the correct website, and the very same website they themselves told me to use? The list of doctors I pulled from their website was wrong. And my favorite? "I can't tell you why it's wrong, but it's wrong". Can't tell me? Um, does that mean it's top secret info? I need clearance of some sort? Or are you just mentally deficient?

3. Therapists with ginormous egos. After finding out that the customer service person was all kinds of wrong (shocker) and that our list of network providers was fine, I finally had people to call for Liam's therapy. And you'd think that after the testing? Making phone calls would be easy. Oh no no no.

First, you have to actually reach someone. I left a total of 32 messages (my list is three pages long). Then I reached the first live person. For a practice which included one woman that was actually also recommended by a friend. That woman wasn't even offered as a possibility to us for Liam. But they had someone else. For reasons I won't go into, she is not going to work for us. The second live person I reached was a very nice guy who was going on a three month trip to teach somewhere. The third person? A total jackass that proceeded to tell me that Children's was wrong and Liam sounds like Aspergers to him. Which is odd because I really didn't go into detail on Liam's issues. Then this guy told me he's writing a book and how "stupid" many other therapists are. He finished by giving me the name of a woman who started an Asperger's support group in the area. Oooook, nice chatting with you... no, you know what, dude? Not really nice talking to you, you big jerk. You didn't shut up at all to listen to what I was asking. I'm a mom. With a kid with some issues that need to be resolved. Get some empathy you moron. I pity the kids that have to put up with trying to cram themselves into a room with you and that ego sucking out all the breathing air. Also? It's not really "chatting" when you do all the talking. I'm just saying.

Ok, so third live person I reached wasn't so bad. She still totally ignored the fact that we had an extensive assessment done and talked about all the testing we could do to figure out Liam's issues (Hello? Is this phone working? Why is no one paying attention to the fact that the testing has been done?).

So what have I learned from my phone calls? 1, many (though not all) therapists seem to think that if they didn't do the testing? The testing was done by a brain-damaged chimp and should be totally disregarded. And 2, for a city as big as Washington DC, and the fact that we live between DC and Annapolis? There are way too many offices not answering their phones. I now officially hate voicemail.

4. (the list of annoyances, remember?) I have to be careful how I write this because I totally love and adore my youngest child. He is sweet. He is cute. He is a wonderful, beautiful child. But he has an annoying thing going on. It started last week. He talks. Non-stop. Like, he could be standing there talking, you could put him in the bathroom, shut the door, come back ten minutes later and he's still talking. Yeah, that kind of talking. And he requires not only an answer to everything he says, but also eye contact at all times. Seriously. All the time. Even if I'm driving (he expects me to continuously look in the rear view mirror the second he says something... which is, basically, all the time.) Like I said, I love my son. But he is four years old and going through what I really hope is a phase. Though I guess it's our own fault. We spend the first year of our kids' lives trying to get them to talk. Then once they finally do, we want them to "just be quiet for one minute, ok?"

So, what have we learned here today? Well, for one thing, we learned that I need more sleep. I am a cranky woman. We learned that you have to be careful when calling random therapists for fear of smacking the phone against your head repeatedly after saying the same thing over and over to a group of people who are supposed to be concerned for your mental health. And we learned that I should totally not update my blog without having had at least one cup of coffee. So sorry about the bad attitude. But it happens, no?